Dopestrong!

Hello world,  

   I was planning to do this in a video- but I have this huge pimple right under my lips and to try match the color tone of foundation with my skin is awfully hard. So I’ll just write this down anyway.

   So two big stories caught everyone’s eye last week. Very evidently, 2013 struck as lightning for a lot of people around the globe. Amazing how a guy on a cycle can draw so much criticism for the use of one word- Dope. But enough about Yo Yo Honey Singh and his music. Let’s talk about the real flag bearer of that department- Lance Armstrong. Last week, after years of defiantly lying that he never used performance enhancers; Armstrong finally came clean. But, what really made us sure he was on drugs was his choice of platform for this admission. I mean if you’ve robbed a million people of their faith in you, scarred the sport forever and successfully struck off the letter V from the word Livestrong; a TV show where a black billionaire is pouncing on you seeking inside information is the last place you’d want to be. But, he chose that anyway.

Punjabi: France Di Tour

    Then it also made to news that Armstrong went teary-eyed during his confession to Oprah. Which is really hard to believe, considering he might have used performance-enhancing onions for that purpose.    

   But, i’ll be honest with you. His confession has hit me severely. It has become incredibly hard for me to trust any guy named Lance. For instance, I was playing GTA Vice City the other day, and in the game a drug dealer named Lance asked me to follow him. I totally freaked out and did this:

   Then last week flagged-off the Maha Kumbh at Allahabad too. A jaw-dropping figure of over 80 million people took a dip in the holy river on the opening day itself. Bathing in the holy Prayag at the Maha Kumbh is known to wash away your karmic debt as per the Hindu mythology. But going by the setting of it- waterside view, thousands of half-naked people and weed stuffed chillams in sight on and off-  it seems like Kumbh is to Sadhus what the Sunburn is to normal people. You know, like a place where all the sadhus can meet up once in few years to dance and chill out.

Kumbh meets Sunburn: DJ Tiesto spinning in Allahabad

   I’m sure going to hell for writing that. But then I can always visit one Kumbh before I die and wash all my karmic debt. I totally love my religion! 

   Leaving you with the real story behind the Armstrong fiasco:

He warned you.